Dear Moms of Middle School Girls,
Well, the emotional TEENAGE TRAIN has begun and I’m afraid it will be a long time before our girls can get off. So, if we are all aboard and on this journey together, let’s help each other out.
Let’s remind our girls of the beauty in friendship. I know the girlfriends in my life are the first to shine light and the last to lock up when I am in darkness. They are the daily gas that fills my tank…giving me joy, laughter, strength, and sometimes just enough of themselves to keep me chugging along. They aren’t throwing me from the train, they are keeping me from jumping. I am usually walked off the ledge of my female crazy, when my girlfriend lends me a hand and shows me I’m not alone in my venting rant! They make my exciting and make all the trips fun!
Women friends give us something different from our families, spouses or children. They bring life to our life and make us feel relevant, beautiful, normal and heard. So, if we cherish these relationships, why don’t we spend more time teaching our daughters how to be good friends? Don’t we want them to have these friendships? Do we truly believe this middle school drama is a rite of passage in order for girls to learn?
I don’t.
I believe that we can start to teach our girls, just as we teach them to read, write, bump, set, spike, dribble, multiply and divide. We can start now and intentionally teach them to be kind to each other.
Let’s tell them that being a good friend is the first step in having good friends. Let’s scold them for leaving out friends, and let’s challenge them to be friends with EVERYONE! Let’s remind them of ways they may hurt others feelings and let’s help them see different perspectives. Let’s remind them each morning that if one girl doesn’t want to be their friend, that there is one girl waiting to be their friend. Teach them to ignore the “she saids” or the “you arents” and teach them to be strong in knowing their self worth from God! Remind them how it felt when they were left out and teach them to stand up and stand out for others, rather than coward down and conform. We all know this is easier said than done and when our babies hurt, so do we. I know that my daughter has been hurt. And, I am most certain that my daughter has done the hurting before, as well. We are all human and the hormones are wild! However, we can try to keep the dialogue of this subject constant and focus on building beautiful women!
We won’t always teach perfectly, and we won’t always have the answers. There will be bumps along the track. But, if our goal is kindness, we will eventually see more smiles, less tears and beautiful teenaged girlfriends. We will see a change in women relationships and a prettier world along the ride!
